Sometimes I sit and contemplate the past. All of the minutes and hours I have lived. The days...weeks...months...years of time that has passed by without my permission. This time just keeps going and sometimes I ponder on the thought of time stopping. There have been several moments in life when I thought to myself "If only I could freeze time right now." You know, when you feel like life couldn't get any better, and you couldn't be any happier...I want to freeze life. Savour the moment, the experience, the life. Unfortunately, I can't freeze time. I am not in control. I am not the one making time tick.
There have been other times when "So this is how it is to be alive" flashes into my brain. Adrenaline, excitement, life, living...its great. I like to say I live life to the fullest everyday, but I can't help being pessimistic and wondering if I'm even living yet. Could there be more? Are others in the world living more? I keep finding new 'adventures' to go on, and each one leaves me feeling adrenaline rushed and excited for the next one, but am I just experiencing life in mediocrity?
Drive through safaris, zip lining, kayaking, off-roading in my jeep...I still want more. I think I just like to be able to say "yeah, I've done that." Flown an airplane-yeah, I've done that. Ridden a camel and elephant-yeah, I've done that. Chased a cow on the open range-yeah, I've done that. Jumped off the top of a house boat into the lake-yeah, I've done that. Performed the thriller dance in public-yeah, I've done that. Been bitten by an emu-yeah, I've done that. Its kindof like a mental bucket list in reverse order. I don't plan these adventures out, but keep track of them after they are conquered. Still, I do the things that I would want to do before I die...but usually they make me feel more alive instead of closer to death.
But still I want more...the world is out there...and we are simply-adventurers.
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