I promised myself I would get something accomplished today...I wouldn't give in to the urge. Beautiful skies, sun shining, and rumors from weather-people that the high today would reach 70 degrees. Perfect day to take the doors off the jeep and go for a drive. That is what I kept saying to myself. No. That's what you always do when you have free time on a pretty day. I kept going back and forth on what to do, what not to do, what I wanted to do, and what I needed to do. Laundry. Clean house. Grade papers. Take Christmas lights down from the house. Yes, that would get me outside and be something productive...success was just through the door.
The sunshine felt glorious. There was a strong breeze that smelled of spring. As I unhooked the light clips from the gutter I kept looking at the sky. The day before today I went ziplining and got to fly. Granted, I was attached to a metal cable by a harness. Its the closest thing to flying I have right now, besides speeding down the highway. Stop. I don't need to go driving...there's so much to do around here.
I have always felt a kindred spirit to birds. You probably think that's wierd, but I've always wanted to know what it would feel like to fly. When I see a flock of geese above, I think they're more free than I am. Freedom. That's what birds have. Pure freedom. Even when I see buzzards circling above a field, I still pause and something inside longs to switch places with those birds. When I was a child I would daydream about being a bird. Being able to float on a breeze and soar. I want to feel that someday. Ziplining is close, but you have to stop at the end of the line...birds have no lines, except those on which they choose to rest.
The Lord rested on the 7th day, but I'm not sure if I understand that. Rest? What is that? Is that what "normal" people do on the days they don't work. Is that the opposite of work? Is rest only when you're asleep, or do people rest when they are awake too? When I'm awake I like to be doing something. On days I'm supposed to rest...I need adventure. I need to feel alive. A few years ago I made one of the best decisions in my life. I bought a jeep. This has been the main source of my adventures ever since. I go anywhere...anytime...and so far have only had to be rescued once. The best part about driving a jeep, other than being able to go on and off the road, is the freedom I feel when the top is down and the doors are off. A friend once asked me "Who wants a vehicle you take apart?" My response: "Who doesn't?" I get almost giddy when I put the top down. Its the first step toward feeling free again. Its the first step toward how I rest...I go. Its been said before that "go" must be my favorite word because I go all the time. So on this pretty afternoon, that's what I wanted to do.
I thought about a nap, but those seem to be more and more just a waste of time. A waste of daylight. So, after doing dishes, cleaning house a little, and taking down the Christmas lights from the house, I felt like I had been productive so I gave in to the urge. I took the doors off, and, since my hardtop is on because of winter, lifted the back window. I love being able to jump in and out of my jeep with the doors off. I love being able to stick my left foot out the door and rest it on the side step while feeling the wind between my toes. I love the wind on my face. I love stretching my arm fully out the side of the jeep without a window sill to rest it on...its like flying. My jeep is my way of flying. About an hour on my favorite drive, which includes a road that goes straight through a creek, and I was happy again. I needed to feel the wind between my toes. Winter has been great with several adventures, but nothing compares to feeling the wind between my toes. I love it, and am thankful for this pretty day in February when I could feel free again.
Monday, February 21, 2011
"When once you have tasted flight..."
Exhileration doesn't even begin to describe the feeling. Nothing does...or perhaps I just don't have a large enough vocabulary. Perhaps there is a word out there to describe what I want to say. I'm sure "normal" people wouldn't understand. They don't have the need to feel that. They know they're alive, no need to check...but as for me...I need to make sure. I need to feel this...this...feeling.
Flying. That's part of it.
I'm not talking about buying a ticket from an airline and going from one place to the next. No. That's not this. This is so much more. Actually feeling the wind on your face as you are moving above the Earth. Its an amazing feeling.
So far I've flown by means of using a harness and a zip line. If you haven't tried this, you should. Hopefully before I die I'll be able to fly by means of other things, like parachutes, hang-gliders, etc. Someday I'll blog about those adventures...but for now...ziplining creates a feeling inside undefinable...
Flying. That's part of it.
I'm not talking about buying a ticket from an airline and going from one place to the next. No. That's not this. This is so much more. Actually feeling the wind on your face as you are moving above the Earth. Its an amazing feeling.
So far I've flown by means of using a harness and a zip line. If you haven't tried this, you should. Hopefully before I die I'll be able to fly by means of other things, like parachutes, hang-gliders, etc. Someday I'll blog about those adventures...but for now...ziplining creates a feeling inside undefinable...
Friday, February 11, 2011
mud on the tires
You know that feeling you get when someone is waiting for you? You've made arrangements to meet at a certain time or place, but you think they are already there wishing you would hurry up? That's how the morning started...
This winter has been marvelous. Snow, snow, and more snow. We keep getting accumulating snow storms that make our days full of sledding instead of schooling. From what many of the locals are saying, I think I'm one of the few "grown-ups" around here that still get that magical feeling when bits of white fall from the sky. As an adolecent, I dreamed of living in a place where there would be snow on the ground from the first day of winter to the last. I absolutely love it. I loved building snowmen, snow forts, and having war with my siblings growing up everytime it snowed. Unfortunately, we rarely saw the magical white fluff, but when we did, it was special. I can remember my mother waking us up hours before the sun would rise to enjoy the newly frosted ground. We would go out and play, then come back inside to sleep the rest of the night away, and when we woke in the morn, she would have homemade hot chocolate ready for us. The best of childhood memories include days like this. Perhaps this is why I'm almost giddy on snow days.
As I said before, this winter has been marvelous. There was a week last month when I went sledding almost everyday. I tried to ski and snowboard. My Jeep has conquered territory the local sherriff's department couldn't conquer. I feel almost invincible when it snows...superhero invincible. I drive a Jeep Wrangler. A vehicle that was made to be used as a tool, not just a mere transportation device. Meant to go anywhere and everywhere. No obstacle has stopped me yet. Its my baby. It adds to my invincibility, but just like superman, kryptonite can spoil my powers. My kryptonite is speed. I know roads can be icy when it has snowed, but I drive a jeep...invincible.
When I went to my friend's house this morning to start our day of planned adventures, I was ready. A day with the girls. It snowed a few days ago, but the roads were almost back to normal. No need for 4WD, or so I thought. The road she lives on is a secondary road, and with the shortage of salt for the road department, these tend to be overlooked. I guess I too overlooked the snow and ice on this road. There were icy patches, but I was ready for adventure. We had decided to meet at her house so I could help load the kids up...I just knew they were waiting on me. Despite my amazing driving abilities, the ice won. I tried to round a curve, but slid off tangent into the woods. Holding on and trying to steer out I failed. I saw i was headed straight for a few trees so I held my breath and hoped for the best. Stopped. I stopped.
I glance around and assess the situation. A tree was beside my driver side wheel but missed by about two inches. A tree was also in front of me, but I stopped about a foot away before hitting it. My jeep was sitting diagonally on an downward hill and had missed the big trees. There were a few smaller trees that I had slid right beside but did not hit them. The mirror on the driver's side door was turned inward flush with the window from the smaller trees going by, but I missed the big trees. Thank you Lord! Now...just back out and we'll be fine. With adrenaline filling my bloodstream I began to try to wiggle my way back to the asphalt. Without thinking I dug a rut under my wheels because I was still not using 4WD and just spinning with every attempt at reverse. I kept thinking "My friend is waiting on me...lets go!" When I finally realized and shifted to 4WD, it was too late. Either the incline was too much, or the rut was too deep. Perhaps I had landed in such a way amongst the trees that would require a tow. I believe it was a combination of all three that defined the situation I was now in. I couldn't drive forward because of trees. I tried going backwards and failed. As my mind scurried to problem solve, and person drove up and offered to help. Feeling obligated to my friend waiting on me, I was delivered by this good samaritan to my first destination of the day. As she opened the door, I greeted her with the news of my unexpected adventure. Knowing her husband would be able to right my wrong with a tow chain when he got off work, we decided to leave my jeep stranded while we continued with our scheduled day.
The rescue mission was as expected. A log chain attached to both vehicles was able to remove my jeep from the wooded incline, especially after a few smaller trees were cut down to save my mirror from being twisted in the opposite direction. My friend's husband had also rescued another friend's jeep last summer. Being the witty man he is, "Nissan-2, Jeep-0" is how he summarized the rescue...and I am grateful for this, even though I can no longer say I have gotten myself out of every situation I have driven into. Muddy tires, tracks beside the road, a front license plate bent, and a slightly scratched hard top and side mirror are the only evidence that remains of this adventure, but I'm sure the memories of my first towing will last a lifetime.
This winter has been marvelous. Snow, snow, and more snow. We keep getting accumulating snow storms that make our days full of sledding instead of schooling. From what many of the locals are saying, I think I'm one of the few "grown-ups" around here that still get that magical feeling when bits of white fall from the sky. As an adolecent, I dreamed of living in a place where there would be snow on the ground from the first day of winter to the last. I absolutely love it. I loved building snowmen, snow forts, and having war with my siblings growing up everytime it snowed. Unfortunately, we rarely saw the magical white fluff, but when we did, it was special. I can remember my mother waking us up hours before the sun would rise to enjoy the newly frosted ground. We would go out and play, then come back inside to sleep the rest of the night away, and when we woke in the morn, she would have homemade hot chocolate ready for us. The best of childhood memories include days like this. Perhaps this is why I'm almost giddy on snow days.
As I said before, this winter has been marvelous. There was a week last month when I went sledding almost everyday. I tried to ski and snowboard. My Jeep has conquered territory the local sherriff's department couldn't conquer. I feel almost invincible when it snows...superhero invincible. I drive a Jeep Wrangler. A vehicle that was made to be used as a tool, not just a mere transportation device. Meant to go anywhere and everywhere. No obstacle has stopped me yet. Its my baby. It adds to my invincibility, but just like superman, kryptonite can spoil my powers. My kryptonite is speed. I know roads can be icy when it has snowed, but I drive a jeep...invincible.
When I went to my friend's house this morning to start our day of planned adventures, I was ready. A day with the girls. It snowed a few days ago, but the roads were almost back to normal. No need for 4WD, or so I thought. The road she lives on is a secondary road, and with the shortage of salt for the road department, these tend to be overlooked. I guess I too overlooked the snow and ice on this road. There were icy patches, but I was ready for adventure. We had decided to meet at her house so I could help load the kids up...I just knew they were waiting on me. Despite my amazing driving abilities, the ice won. I tried to round a curve, but slid off tangent into the woods. Holding on and trying to steer out I failed. I saw i was headed straight for a few trees so I held my breath and hoped for the best. Stopped. I stopped.
I glance around and assess the situation. A tree was beside my driver side wheel but missed by about two inches. A tree was also in front of me, but I stopped about a foot away before hitting it. My jeep was sitting diagonally on an downward hill and had missed the big trees. There were a few smaller trees that I had slid right beside but did not hit them. The mirror on the driver's side door was turned inward flush with the window from the smaller trees going by, but I missed the big trees. Thank you Lord! Now...just back out and we'll be fine. With adrenaline filling my bloodstream I began to try to wiggle my way back to the asphalt. Without thinking I dug a rut under my wheels because I was still not using 4WD and just spinning with every attempt at reverse. I kept thinking "My friend is waiting on me...lets go!" When I finally realized and shifted to 4WD, it was too late. Either the incline was too much, or the rut was too deep. Perhaps I had landed in such a way amongst the trees that would require a tow. I believe it was a combination of all three that defined the situation I was now in. I couldn't drive forward because of trees. I tried going backwards and failed. As my mind scurried to problem solve, and person drove up and offered to help. Feeling obligated to my friend waiting on me, I was delivered by this good samaritan to my first destination of the day. As she opened the door, I greeted her with the news of my unexpected adventure. Knowing her husband would be able to right my wrong with a tow chain when he got off work, we decided to leave my jeep stranded while we continued with our scheduled day.
The rescue mission was as expected. A log chain attached to both vehicles was able to remove my jeep from the wooded incline, especially after a few smaller trees were cut down to save my mirror from being twisted in the opposite direction. My friend's husband had also rescued another friend's jeep last summer. Being the witty man he is, "Nissan-2, Jeep-0" is how he summarized the rescue...and I am grateful for this, even though I can no longer say I have gotten myself out of every situation I have driven into. Muddy tires, tracks beside the road, a front license plate bent, and a slightly scratched hard top and side mirror are the only evidence that remains of this adventure, but I'm sure the memories of my first towing will last a lifetime.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
the world is out there
Sometimes I sit and contemplate the past. All of the minutes and hours I have lived. The days...weeks...months...years of time that has passed by without my permission. This time just keeps going and sometimes I ponder on the thought of time stopping. There have been several moments in life when I thought to myself "If only I could freeze time right now." You know, when you feel like life couldn't get any better, and you couldn't be any happier...I want to freeze life. Savour the moment, the experience, the life. Unfortunately, I can't freeze time. I am not in control. I am not the one making time tick.
There have been other times when "So this is how it is to be alive" flashes into my brain. Adrenaline, excitement, life, living...its great. I like to say I live life to the fullest everyday, but I can't help being pessimistic and wondering if I'm even living yet. Could there be more? Are others in the world living more? I keep finding new 'adventures' to go on, and each one leaves me feeling adrenaline rushed and excited for the next one, but am I just experiencing life in mediocrity?
Drive through safaris, zip lining, kayaking, off-roading in my jeep...I still want more. I think I just like to be able to say "yeah, I've done that." Flown an airplane-yeah, I've done that. Ridden a camel and elephant-yeah, I've done that. Chased a cow on the open range-yeah, I've done that. Jumped off the top of a house boat into the lake-yeah, I've done that. Performed the thriller dance in public-yeah, I've done that. Been bitten by an emu-yeah, I've done that. Its kindof like a mental bucket list in reverse order. I don't plan these adventures out, but keep track of them after they are conquered. Still, I do the things that I would want to do before I die...but usually they make me feel more alive instead of closer to death.
But still I want more...the world is out there...and we are simply-adventurers.
There have been other times when "So this is how it is to be alive" flashes into my brain. Adrenaline, excitement, life, living...its great. I like to say I live life to the fullest everyday, but I can't help being pessimistic and wondering if I'm even living yet. Could there be more? Are others in the world living more? I keep finding new 'adventures' to go on, and each one leaves me feeling adrenaline rushed and excited for the next one, but am I just experiencing life in mediocrity?
Drive through safaris, zip lining, kayaking, off-roading in my jeep...I still want more. I think I just like to be able to say "yeah, I've done that." Flown an airplane-yeah, I've done that. Ridden a camel and elephant-yeah, I've done that. Chased a cow on the open range-yeah, I've done that. Jumped off the top of a house boat into the lake-yeah, I've done that. Performed the thriller dance in public-yeah, I've done that. Been bitten by an emu-yeah, I've done that. Its kindof like a mental bucket list in reverse order. I don't plan these adventures out, but keep track of them after they are conquered. Still, I do the things that I would want to do before I die...but usually they make me feel more alive instead of closer to death.
But still I want more...the world is out there...and we are simply-adventurers.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)